Set the scene for the tantric massage
Create a space that pleases all of the senses. Candles, incense, soft bed linen and beautiful background music can all help to make the space feel peaceful. Finding time and space where you won’t be disturbed can also help for the space to feel more safe.
Be aware that it can often take a long time for people with a Yoni to feel safe enough to be ready for a Yoni massage. It can be a good idea to start with a connection ritual. This can involve eye-gazing, holding hands and sharing your intentions for the session. Continue by giving a sensual massage to the full body before considering offering the Yoni massage. A good tip is to spend long enough on the massage for the receiver to become aroused and ready for more intimacy.
Ask permission for the Yoni massage
Many women and people with a Yoni have experienced intimate touch that has been too much or too fast for them. It is therefore good practice to ask the receiver whether they would like the Yoni massage. Wait for a yes before proceeding!
One way to build arousal is to explore the outside of the Yoni. Massage the vulva, the outer lips, the inner lips, the spaces between the lips, the entrance to the vagina… use your imagination! Vary the speed, pressure and types of strokes – be creative.
Know the Yoni anatomy
Learn about the anatomy of the Yoni and the locations of the various pleasure spots. These include the G-spot – a ridged area near the entrance of the Yoni, A-spot – past the g-spot, P-spot at the perineum and the U-spot, near the urethra. Know where the clitoris and the cervix are located, and continue to experiment with different types of touch to find what the recipient enjoys.
Ask for feedback
It is fine to ask the recipient for feedback! Ask them what is enjoyable, what is less so and what they would like. Listen to them, and thank them for sharing.
Let go of goals and expectations
Something which can get overlooked is remembering not to push for a particular outcome, such as an orgasm. Allow the experience to unfold naturally, staying present with your partner and the experience.
Be prepared to hold space
Many people with a Yoni have some pain in this area. Be prepared that pleasure may not be the only response you get – and may not be the response at all. Holding space means being fully present with the other whilst practising unconditional positive regard. This can allow the person receiving the massage to feel comfortable enough to share any areas of physical pain that are encountered. There are often strong emotions that have been stored in the Yoni, so be prepared that the receiver may feel and express shame, sadness, anger or other emotions. When holding space the invitation is to witness what comes up, without judgment.
I offer Yoni massage in Teesside/ North Yorkshire and London as part of a holistic tantric healing therapy. For more information, comments, or to book a session please contact me firstname.lastname@example.org / 07778340823 or click here.