Tantric Therapy for Porn Addiction and Intimacy Recovery
Pornography plays different roles for different people. For some, it can be a source of curiosity, arousal, or inspiration — part of exploring pleasure in a safe and accessible way. For others, however, habitual or compulsive use can begin to interfere with intimacy, sexual function, and emotional connection. Porn itself isn’t inherently good or bad — what matters most is how it affects you personally.
Within my two approaches to tantric bodywork — pleasure-focused tantric massage and therapy-based tantric healing (somatic sex therapy) — there are alternative ways to connect with arousal, presence, and intimacy without relying on porn. These practices invite you back into your body, helping you explore pleasure with awareness while also addressing the deeper emotional or relational patterns that may underlie compulsive use.
Did you know? Porn sites such as PornHub get more visitors than Netflix, Amazon and Twitter combined.
Benefits of Porn Use
Although porn can often have negative connotations, there are benefits of watching or listening to porn. These can include finding new ideas for lovemaking, and many people report an improvement in their sex life as a result of watching porn. This may be because it can help to get in touch with, or stay in touch with, the feelings of arousal in the body, and provide ideas for fun explorations.
At What Point does Using Pornography Become Porn Addiction?
Many people regularly watch pornography without feeling the need to watch for hours on end daily. It is much like those who drink a glass of wine with their meal, and leave it at that for the night. According to Nicole Prause, a sexual biotechnology research scientist, it is down to whether the person considers themselves to be addicted. She takes the view that pornography addiction is not a diagnosis. There are numerous factors at play, such as cultural upbringing, shame, and libido. For example, someone who has been brought up in a religious sect that severely shamed masturbation and sexuality may believe that even a light use is too much and that they are addicted – whereas it would be considered a low or ‘normal’ amount by another. According to a study done by Prause and colleague Steele, porn-addicted brains did not behave in the same way as the brains of drug and gambling addicts.
This is in opposition to the 2014 University of Cambridge study that did find a link between porn addiction and brain activity. The researchers found that brain activity in sex addiction mirrored that of drug addiction. The most research in support of porn rewiring the brain has been carried out by the Your Brain on Porn (YBOP) study. According to them, the 43 neurological studies which have looked at the brain structures of Internet porn users and sex/porn addicts “offers support for the porn addiction model… [and] are consistent with over 330 internet addiction ‘brain studies’”.
What are the Problems of Watching Excessive Porn?
It may be that you are using porn with beneficial side effects. It may also be that you are experiencing some sexual issues, which may or may not be related to excessive porn use. These are some of the most common things I hear from those who consider themselves to be addicted to porn:
- Difficulty in getting aroused in real-life situations, and difficulty staying aroused with real-life partners
- Needing to think about porn to become aroused in real-life situations
- Difficulties with getting, and maintaining, an erection. Read more about whether porn-induced erectile dysfunction (PIED) is a real phenomenon. Read more about how tantric therapy can help with ED.
- Requiring more and more stimulation, for example, watching more extreme scenes or scenarios, to get the same level of arousal
- Anxiety about sexual performance, especially when comparing self with porn stars
“Pornography creates sexual expectations that are divorced from intimacy, leaving people chasing arousal while starving for connection.” — Gary Wilson, Your Brain on Porn
Using Tantric Bodywork Techniques to Alleviate Porn Addiction
Tantric massage therapy — sometimes referred to as tantric healing or somatic sex therapy — offers powerful alternatives to compulsive porn use by helping clients reconnect with their bodies, sensations, and intimacy. Here are five ways it can support recovery and healing:
Shift from head to body: The ‘pendulation method’ (Joseph Kramer) helps clients alternate between watching porn and focusing on body sensations. Over time, this reduces reliance on visual stimulation.
Reclaim your body: Explore new ways of touching, discover what feels good, and practice expressing boundaries. This builds self-trust and shifts arousal back into the body.
Release tension: Gentle bodywork calms the mind and helps dissolve physical blocks that restrict pleasure and energy flow.
Improve arousal: Massage and conscious touch increase circulation to the genital area, supporting stronger erections and deeper pleasure.
Build intimacy: Tantric practices cultivate presence and openness, helping clients reconnect with real-life partners instead of screens.
Embracing Mindful Intimacy
Transitioning from habitual porn consumption to tantric practices requires patience and self-compassion. It’s about shifting focus from instant gratification to sustained, meaningful experiences.Through breathwork, meditation, and conscious touch, individuals can cultivate a richer, more nuanced understanding of their own desires and boundaries.
This journey not only aids in overcoming addiction but also opens the door to a more profound appreciation of intimacy, both with oneself and with others.
Taking the First Step
If you’re seeking to move beyond the confines of pornography and explore deeper realms of connection and pleasure, consider exploring tantric practices.Engaging with a qualified tantric practitioner can provide guidance tailored to your unique journey, helping you navigate the path toward healing and self-discovery.
I offer tantric massage for pleasure, and therapy-based sessions (tantric healing / somatic sex therapy) for those seeking support with porn use, intimacy, or sexual dysfunction. Sessions are available for individuals and couples in Teesside/North Yorkshire, London, and online (talk-based). Sessions are tailored to your goals — whether that’s awakening sensual energy, breaking free from porn dependence, or exploring trauma-informed healing.
Updated October 2025